Monday, October 17, 2005

How Many Seconds Does it Take a Nice Jewish Girl to Change a Lightbulb?

Welcome to the Knitting Nook! It's time for Christina's Fall Knit-O-Rama!
Canoli's always welcome!

I have to tell you, I haven't been doing that much knitting, or even thinking about knitting. On Saturday night, I was completely and utterly paralyzed by the Penn State game.

How could we lose in one second? One second? You can't even run a play in under 5 seconds (although Michigan, apparently, can run a play in 4 seconds, yeah, whatever, not that I'm bitter or anything). So, I've been thinking a lot about the seconds of our lives. How many bad decisions have I made in one second? How many seconds would I like to get back? How many hours of regret stem from one second of bad play calling? Which is just a bit of a preview of the case, I have to try next week. So, if I don't post too often, or my posts aren't a laugh a minute, it's because I'm deep in trial psychosis (which usually means that you've convinced yourself that you're going to win a case that you should lose, but in this case, I've convinced myself that I'm going to lose a case I should win. Everyone always asks me, "how can you represent someone you know is guilty?" That's the easy part - representing the innocent is the hard part. Those are the clients you lose sleep over, those are the losses from which you never recover. I'm not saying I don't give it my all for all of my clients, but those innocent guys doing time for my own bad seconds at trial . . .it's a hard thing to have on your conscience). And I'm very busy lining up my suits for trial. Jurors are not allowed to talk about the facts of the case until they deliberate, so most jurors talk about the most pressing things that are going on in the courtroom .. . what the lawyers are wearing. I've been told that my closing suit, a nice plum number, is dandy.

Anyway, luckily, knitting with friends is never a second gone bad, and we knit . . . all day! Oh, did I mention we ate too?

Robin worked on her Koigu Rambling Rows blanket, which is due, oh, I mean the baby is due, in early December , and she is forbidden from eating, sleeping, or touching her other project, this Rowan slip stitch sweater altered a la Grace until it's done(by the way Grace, if you're reading this, good luck with all of your new endeavors!)

And, speaking of Robin, remember when I wrote this way back in August "But, if you shouldn't knit for a baby that doesn't exist (and let's be clear, you shouldn't), should you show up for dinner for a relationship that doesn't exist? I guess we'll have to wait for the update next week, but my feeling is that they're one in the same - both lead to disappointment, and, sigh . . . sex." Well, I'm not one to say I told you so, but don't set the table any time soon for a relationship that has already completed dessert. Sex, than disappointment . . . Wesley has been dealt with. And, if anyone is missing Robin on Wednesday night, it might be because she has a date . . . By the way, just because dinner isn't such a good idea, keeping the jewelry is. No reason to throw good Tiffany out with the dirty dinner dishes . . .

And, Alison was knitting away with Kid Silk Night, however, I didn't snag a picture, so you'll just have to admire her recently completed shawl, which is made out of something, from some pattern somewhere:.

Heather learned a three needle bindoff ,

and sewed up her cute as a button jumper:

Lori . . . Lori Lori Lori. Lori is knitting a humongous sweater for her boyfriend of all of ten months, who she lives with, who she met on JDate. I don't know about the rest of you Jdating women, but these are the guys that email me on Jdate:

And, you know, I hesitated before making fun of my jdate experience - what if one of these guys' sister or mother knits and reads my blog? -- but you know what, if they do -- tell your brother or your son to get a better damn picture! I don't care if you're a nerd, fat, or goofy, Dude, you have got to have a better picture! There has got to be a picture of you out there doing something fun, or with your friends, or something SOMETHING besides the above nightmare, which, when you open your email, hoping for Mr. Right, you get, Mr. You Paralyzed My Face Into This Hideous Gasp Called Oh The Horror, I Have Got to Cancel My JDate Subscription. Whoever you are, you may win us over with your stellar personality, but you gotta get the date first! And, you may also want to tell you brother or son, that you may want to try emailing people your on age, it's always a better conversation starter.

Anyway, we all gasped -- the dreaded boyfriend curse! No no, stop knitting!!!! So, I didn't want to further the effects of the curse by photographing all of that loving knittng that may go the way of the boyfriend ditchout. I only knit for one boyfriend, and we did indeed break up. I took a FairIsle class, and to practice, I knit a hat -- Augie (O.k., maybe it wasn't the knitting, maybe it was the name) was going skiing, he would need a hat - perfect! Well, my tension was crap, and the snowflakes on the hat looked more like floating turds. So, I decided to felt the thing, make it all better. So, I threw it in the washing machine. Unfortunately, there wasn't enough time between the ski trip and the washing for the hat to dry, so I handed over a soggy, smelly hat that looked like a vomit catching bucket. So, maybe it was the knitting . . . it was really hard to say "it was the thought that count" about that hat and get any sympathy. . . Anyway, good luck Lori - you've already had better luck with Jdate than I have, I'm sure the knitting will work out for you too!
And, what was Theresa up to - she's in a knitting funk, so she pulled out the trusty Manos blanket - Lovely lovely! Hopefully, between the cheese explosion bread and Robin's caramel brownies, she is out of her knit-funk. Did I mention we ate at this gathering?
And our hostess? What was she up to? Well, as usual the Bach beagles were stealing the spotlight. Here, guy models the dryer lint scarf:

And Molly (or is this Maggie?) was having none of mama finishing her Silk Garden sweater:.

And, as the 8:00 hour drew near, and our television schedules diverged (West Wing v. Cold Case) knit-o-rama came to a close. And, this blog took all of 49 minutes to write, only 2,940 seconds! Time, hopefully, well spent.


'Thought & Humor' said...
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Knitty Delicious said...

did we eat at knitarama????? THanks for the great photos...the one of Mr Gus in the scarf is a riot!